Imagine, this is an article on publisher website...
It's toe-tappingly tragic!
I never loved you. Aww, it's true. I've been hiding it for so long. You can see how I lived before I met you. Then throw her in the laundry room, which will hereafter be referred to as "the brig".
Good news, everyone! There's a report on TV with some very bad news! Good man. Nixon's pro-war and pro-family. Whoa a real live robot; or is that some kind of cheesy New Year's costume? How much did you make me?
Oh dear! She's stuck in an infinite loop, and he's an idiot! Well, that's love for you.
With gusto. Then throw her in the laundry room, which will hereafter be referred to as "the brig". Ven ve voke up, ve had zese wodies. Um, is this the boring, peaceful kind of taking to the streets? I'm sorry, guys. I never meant to hurt you. Just to destroy everything you ever believed in.
- Whoa a real live robot; or is that some kind of cheesy New Year's costume?
- I saw you with those two "ladies of the evening" at Elzars. Explain that.
- You won't have time for sleeping, soldier, not with all the bed making you'll be doing.
Yes, if you make it look like an electrical fire. When you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all.
I'm a thing. Negative, bossy meat creature! Son, as your lawyer, I declare y'all are in a 12-piece bucket o' trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin' up that ol' mess you caused.
- Kids have names?
- No, just a regular mistake.
- Hello Morbo, how's the family?
I've got to find a way to escape the horrible ravages of youth. Suddenly, I'm going to the bathroom like clockwork, every three hours. And those jerks at Social Security stopped sending me checks. Now 'I'' have to pay ''them'! Why did you bring us here?
That's a popular name today. Little "e", big "B"? OK, if everyone's finished being stupid. Then throw her in the laundry room, which will hereafter be referred to as "the brig". Um, is this the boring, peaceful kind of taking to the streets?
Bender, being God isn't easy. If you do too much, people get dependent on you, and if you do nothing, they lose hope. You have to use a light touch. Like a safecracker, or a pickpocket. Hey, whatcha watching?
Okay, I like a challenge. Yes, I saw. You were doing well, until everyone died. As an interesting side note, as a head without a body, I envy the dead. Yes. You gave me a dollar and some candy. Oh yeah, good luck with that.
I am the man with no name, Zapp Brannigan! No, of course not. It was… uh… porno. Yeah, that's it. Why yes! Thanks for noticing. These old Doomsday Devices are dangerously unstable. I'll rest easier not knowing where they are.
Hey, guess what you're accessories to. Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn't I break his legs? No, of course not. It was… uh… porno. Yeah, that's it. I wish! It's a nickel.
Is that a cooking show? Hey, guess what you're accessories to. Now what? Pansy. You lived before you met me?! Take me to your leader!
This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! The key to victory is discipline, and that means a well made bed. You will practice until you can make your bed in your sleep. I'll tell them you went down prying the wedding ring off his cold, dead finger.
Ooh, name it after me! Professor, make a woman out of me. No argument here. Bender, you risked your life to save me! Wow, you got that off the Internet? In my day, the Internet was only used to download pornography.
There's no part of that sentence I didn't like! Nay, I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death with his own Oscar. Kif, I have mated with a woman. Inform the men. Kif, I have mated with a woman. Inform the men.
What are their names? We're also Santa Claus! Ow, my spirit! Yeah, and if you were the pope they'd be all, "Straighten your pope hat." And "Put on your good vestments." We'll need to have a look inside you with this camera.